Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Belated Momversation Monday: Facebook

So the conversation on momversation was about facebook. The gist of the conversation was: Social networking sites like Facebook are a great way to communicate with friends old and new. But do they take us out of the "real world?" Or do they make stay-at-home moms feel less isolated? Are you on Facebook, MySpace, or Twitter? Do you find yourself on Facebook for too long? Or is it just a harmless diversion?

I do use Facebook, but I am not on it nearly as much as I would have to be to keep up with my friends. I do tend to spend more time on blogger than on Facebook. On the one hand, it has been awesome to catch up with old friends and I like getting the status messages, somehow its like it lets me peek into my friends lives and I feel a bit closer to them.

On the other hand, I think it could be bad for someone like me. I am a phonophobe, I hate talking on the phone. Well, that's inaccurate. I like talking to people, but with the kids and all the chaos, talking on the phone is impossible. It makes me feel a little schizoid, mid sentence I have to break off to keep the kids from doing something awful, then I lose my train of thought.... good times. So I tend to avoid the phone and do most of my "catching up" in person. This used to work fine, when we all had toddlers and everyone had alot of time on their hands. But now, I don't have much spare time at all, and neither do most of my friends, we are all busy jumping from activity to activity with the older kiddos.

I worry that for someone like me Facebook give a false sense of closeness. I don't make the extra effort to call my friends, or to send a personal email, because I have already "caught up" on Facebook. But its really not the same as having an actual conversation. I think its a bit of a problem for the hermit inside of me.

My other problem is I find that when I log into Facebook, and I plan on just "checking" it for a minute, a minute turns into an hour..... and I don't like that. I don't want my kids major memories of me to involve the computer, I would much rather they involved a book. Im not sure I have the time to support the facebook addiction and the blogger addiction. So many good techonological advances these days would like to drag me away from playing with my kids and necking with my husband. Im just not sure its always worth it.


Rob said...

Ah the age old situation of "balance". I know how you feel here and I can relate.

There are many things online that I'm behind on and I feel the need to "keep up". For me, it's much like affluenza but instead with technology and the conveniences it brings. Same trap, different implements.

Anytime I'm on the computer at home I have to ask myself, "is this okay right now" because as parents/spouses we're always trading one thing for another it seems.

Every so often I ask Heather how I'm doing and she either backs em up or says gently, well maybe some more family time would be good. And for me that helps me stay balanced.

Carrie Thompson said...

hey hermit,

on my list of things to do this week is make lunch plans with a friend! I pick you! Let's both get out of blogger and facebook and have some real world time! Let me know if you have time for lunch (with kids of course) or coffee or anything....maybe run by Sihn Sihn (spell) and pick up those dumplings? Whatever, YOU tell me!

Jennifer said...

Im emailing you now!